What's On My Mind; Delayed April Goals Report

Posted Wednesday, April 5, 2023 by Sri. Tagged JOURNAL

Wednesday, April 5, 2023.

Hey, a quick update!

These past few weeks have been very intense due to family-related travel and other pressing issues, and after that is over I have only a week to finish my taxes without my long-time accountant! Am feeling under a lot of stress, so I'm deferring my Groundhog Day Resolutions (GHDR) Report for April 4 until later in the month. Until then, here's a preview of what I've been thinking about!

You know that expression "fail early, fail often?" from tech startup culture? I think that describes the state of my current push to get my yearly goals moving. While it's only been two months, I'm again feeling both limited by my ability to focus and do uncertain tasks with future rewards. As a result, I feel stuck in first gear with a bad tank of gas causing my engine of productivity to sputter and stall. It's hard to remember where I'm going. I am also missing any sense of progression. This has always been a problem for me, particularly as a wannabe solopreneur working in a vacuum.

The New Thing I was trying this year was to design ways of including people in all levels of my activity as a mitigation to my ADHD. Working with engaged people is very motivating, perhaps the only kind of motivation that works with me when it comes to perservering through otherwise boring tasks. On paper this is a great idea, as I know it has worked in the past for me, but in practice I think it's going to take much longer to find the right people at the right moment in their life.

On my mind right now:

  • My uncle's memorial service in St. Louis, a man with a zillion ideas and an open heart to helping others, but with (I think) severe undiagnosed ADHD, with one notable success that reminds me of one I had in high school.

  • Virginia Heffernan's WIRED article about the spiritual+scientific driving forces behind TSMC

    Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing Company, he maker of 92% of the world's most advanced chips.

    : curiosity and stamina.
  • Whether or not I'm actually focused what naturally comes to me as a career. I've thought of myself as a trained programmer and designer, but my heart may lie elsewhere completely.

I'm hoping to get to finishing the report after my sister's visit this week while taking a break from doing my taxes from scratch. Wish me luck!